Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Snow

It's snowing heavily. This is about the thickest snowfall I've seen in years here. I love winter weather. I love the cold. I love dreary days. I love rain. I always say I come alive this time of year. I think it's because I'm often depressed. I've had depression most of my life. Also I'm naturally very pale. So I think this time of year just agrees with me. There is something so obnoxious about summer to me. It's annoying how happy everyone gets about it. It's annoying how bright the sun is....and it's annoying how everyone flaunts their toned, tan bodies as much as possible. I guess I'm weird, but I almost get some sort of sick pleasure out of people being miserable in the winter. It's like "ha-ha ....now you all have to be as miserable as I always am." lol Isn't that quite a weird, pathetic thing to think?? I went running last night again. I ran for 25min and let me just tell you....I want to die today. I'm so sore!! Like any movement is exhausting. I knew I would weigh more today because I haven't been peeing much and I ate alot more yesterday w/o any bowel movements. I felt good about my intake yesterday, but I know I definitely could drop a few pounds if I used the restroom. I'm so bloated atm. I weighed 132. Which I don't even feel phased by because it's exactly what I predicted I would weigh given this lack of bathroom usage. I had off the past 2 days and it was soooo lovely. I seriously get my stomach all in knots thinking about going into work today. I hate this job so much. I hate the people. I hate the customers. I hate it all. I just want to be in an office....working on tasks and in solitude. I am about to work 8 days straight...6 of which are closing shifts which mean that I have to work till 10pm or later 6 of those days. :( In a way it's sort of good because I'll be so tired from a lack of days off that I don't think I could manage going into work any earlier than 1pm everyday. I work retail btw. I'm an HR manager for a retail store. Anyways ....until next time...

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