Idk anymore

Okay so life has been so weird here lately....I don't know whats happening with me. I don't have the will power for this anymore, but I'm so obsessed at the same time that I can't let go for sure. So u eat about 600-800 calories a day now. = ( But I weighed 146 today????? how in the world do I weigh the least I ever have but I'm eating now! I'm just all confused about the diet and life in general.

I have recently gotten really good a purging. This is bad. I feel out of control. Knowing i have the ability to purge has caused my self control to plummet even further. I purged all day long. It started after I felt sick this morning from eating broccoli. I was so nauseous and then it occurred to me that if I purged I would feel relieved...so thats when the binging started. I ate a ton of potatoes, sweet potatoe, oatmeal, green beans, a sandwich....blah blah blah... I got at least 3/4 of it up. I'm not good at following through because I wear out quickly, but I think I get rid of most.

I probably consumed around 600 calories considering what all was digested by the end of it. I'll do better tomorrow. Hopefully I can still be 145 tomorrow seeing as I'm on some kind of losing streak.

Until next time.